“We are made to know ourselves; we are created for this self-awareness; we are fully equipped for it. What could be more important than to know ourselves?” - Kabir Edmund Helminski
What does it mean to know one’s self? We are born into the world as a blank slate, and as time goes on we encounter unique experiences that shape us into the person we are. This cycle of experiences evolves and creates a false sense of “knowing”. We attach labels to ourselves - gender, race, religion, education, personal likes/dislikes…limiting our ability to see beyond that scope. This process leads us to believe that we are fulfilling ourselves.
Coming out of the fog of addiction, depression and suicidal ideations, I was hit with a sudden and painful realization - I did not know who I was. This realization was not an easy thing to be confronted with, let alone accept as true. I didn’t know it at the time, but this moment of clarity would be the first step toward awakening.
I was forced to practice self-awareness. It was a means to survive and escape the grips of addiction. I had been living life unconsciously for so long that I had detached from everything - including my soul.
When someone asked me “What makes you happy?” I truly could not answer it. I had spent my life having nightmares of the past and dreams of the future…but never in the present. Unknowingly, the only connection I had with myself was with my ego. I was in a constant battle to protect my false sense of identity and bruised ego.
My journey to awakening was diverging in all directions but I soon realized that this was a beautiful and imperfect opportunity. I became open to exploring and experiencing life without attachment.
Living life consciously is not an easy transition, but once it transpires, life becomes more than one could have ever dreamed.
Are you merely existing or truly living? Answering this question honestly, without fear of admission could be the start of your own awakening.
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