When we open the door from our side, it thus remains open, unless we reclose it.
Honesty is a recurring and prevalent spiritual principle in recovery. It is the basis of the program but its power extends far beyond keeping the spiritual malady contained. I witnessed this firsthand, as I continually tried to enter the path of sobriety but repeatedly failed. I learned that honesty was the first step at recovery but my mind was so distorted by my conditioned belief systems that I could not be honest with myself. I unconsciously believed that as long as I shared some half truth to those around me, I was being honest. But unconsciously I had been lying to myself for so many years, I could not comprehend full honesty - with Self and others. I could not see the impact that living dishonesty was causing. How one small lie would turn into three more lies in order to cover the first one.
People struggling with substance abuse disorders may encounter or experience dishonesty on a greater scale than most because they are, consciously and unconsciously, protecting their addictions at all costs. This leads to web of lies that grows unmanageable over time. However, I soon realized that this dishonesty was affecting my life in other areas well beyond addiction. It was the false story I told myself about what I “wanted” in life, the justifications I made to deny my authentic self. And, I fully and genuinely believed those lies. Even as the evidence built up contrary to my lies. Just as Richard Rohr explains, “We think we are our thinking, and we even take that thinking as utterly “true”, which removes us at least two steps from reality itself.” My dishonest thinking had created an illusionary existence of false Self.
“Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom”- Thomas Jefferson
What is revealed past the veil of dishonesty is freedom from the bondage of self. It opens the gate to our connection to the Universe and our higher Self. It is the process of being honest about our past dishonesty that Richard Rohr explains as, “We are blinded inside of either total light or total darkness, but “the light shines on inside of darkness, and it is a light that darkness cannot overcome” (John 1:5).” By uncovering our darkness we find the light beneath it, that was waiting to be discovered.
“The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” - Plato